An Epic Story in 10 Words

Once upon a time, various epic stuff happened. The end.


Dear Diary: A Tear Jerking Story

Last night, after reading ‘The Remarkable Life and Times of Eliza Rose’ (or whatever it’s called), I put down the book and cried.

No I didn’t. I put down the book and got out my phone.

You see, stories can’t make me cry. Even at the end of My Sister Jodie, I didn’t cry when ———- (don’t want to ruin the story if you haven’t read it.) I tried to afterwards because I felt bad, but it took some effort. But when I picked up my phone, I remembered the Darren Shan, the author, and then I remembered the Saga of Darren Shan (Oh my goodness I think I’m going to cry again). I started to wonder whether the book series had a wikipedia. It did… So I spent a while looking it up. For some reason when I started, I couldn’t stop (have it in mind that it was about 1 am and I was EXTREMELY tired.) I read the whole plot outline and looked at all the character- even those that only appeared in one particular page. Remembering all the events, all the deaths and the ending made me just well up with tears. It didn’t make any noise of course- it was past midnight, but I was seriously crying my eyes out when I finished Sons of Destiny and praising Darren Shan’s (character) actions and how he save the world etc. I even went up to my mum and started telling her about it, still crying.

Fun fact (may cause spoilers) : If you take the first word of the first book and the last word of the last book, you get ‘I’ve gone.’ I just wanted to share that.

I totally in love with the story. I use the names Darren and Tom (Tom from my other favourite book series The Spook’s Apprentice) in a lot of my stories including one I’m writing now),I read most of the manga by Takahiro Arai that I found in my local library (I’m on volume 10) and I’ve watched the movie which, I’m sorry I have to say this, SUCKED very VERY BADLY! Sorry people who created the film but I lost interest at the point when I see that monkey girl and the goblin-looking little people. I mean, what the heck happened to Debbie?! I liked her. And those little people- they had NOSES. NOSES!!! I continued watching (because I hate stopping something halfway through) but I didn’t pay attention. I don’t even know how it ends- not that I care. They must make a new movie that is at lease 96% accurate with NO monkey girls and no little people with BLOODY NOSES! *cries*

Talking about the little people, Takahiro Arai, the mangaka of the manga series, really surprised me with his art. I mean, the characters were well drawn and the characters looks weren’t what I expected, but fit the story very well especially Vancha, Debbie, Evra, Truska and Darren. But Harkat and the rest of the little people were EXACTLY as I imagined. Takahirro-sensei drew him perfectly and I loved the way he looked- he’s so cute. Look!

I ❤ Harkat. And Darren of course.

I’m not sure I can say that I love Darren Shan (the author) because I’ve never met him before, but I can say that I’m in love with his writing and whenever I pick up one of his books, I get this kind of familiar warm feeling and a stupid grin stretches across my face (when I read the Thin Executioner which, by the way, was AWESOME!) Honestly, if I could write stories like Darren Shan (author) filled with epicness, some comedy, horror, adventure and tear-jerking moments that makes people grin stupidly when they pick up another story, then I’d be the happiest person alive… No joke.

I’m definitely reading Zom-B next. I wonder if it’ll be anything like warm bodies… Nah, it definitely going to be better- this is DARREN SHAN we’re talking about.

I’ll stop here.

Okay , I’ll really stop now.

~EpicCupcake signing out.

The Epic Seme Handbook

Want to be an epic seme? Check out the following rules the following rules:

  1. You must be taller than your uke.
  2. If not, wear really tall shoes or learn how to fly.
  3. You must not cry- that’s an uke thing.*
  4. You must not blush- again, that’s an uke thing. Personally, I don’t mind because blushing semes are moe.*
  5. You must not eat sweets- period.*
  6. You must have perverted thoughts about doing it with your uke everyday (or at least a few times a week).
  7. Feel free to use ropes on your uke- nothing says romance more than a little yandere-ism.
  8. You must be overprotective of your uke- remember: everyone is after him.
  9. A fujoshi may be spying on you doing ecchi stuff with your uke. Don’t stop- ignore her and continue.
  10. Your ultimate goal is to successfully pleasure your uke. Don’t let him fall asleep without giving him a night he’ll NEVER forget. 😉
  11. Don’t worry if you are younger than your uke- older uke younger seme couples are more common than you think.
  12. You must be a super sexy bishounen- if you’re not, you are wasting your time (AND mine).
  13. You must be stronger than your uke. Most ukes want a man who’ll protect them/come running to their rescue. If you are weak, pretend.
  14. You must be able to pin down a grown man with one hand. It may be tough, but practice makes perfect!
  15. And the most obvious: you must be on top- always.

*Do unless you are a chibi seme (moe… *drools*)

~EpicCupcake signing out.

The Epic Uke Handbook

Want to be an epic uke? Check out the following rules the following rules:

  1. You must be shorter than your seme.
  2. If you’re not, then get your seme to wear really tall shoes or learn how to fly. Still, you could always wear a leash and crawl on the floor like a dog crouch down…
  3. You must be a super cute bishie.
  4. You must be clueless and/or innocent, but if you can’t be either, just be like aki from Honto Yajuu
  5. You must always blush when your seme does ecchi things to you- it’s common courtesy.
  6. It is also common courtesy to make erotic noises like ‘ahn!’ every second while your seme pleasures you.
  7. It’s okay if you’re tsundere- that just makes you cuter.
  8. You must always be loyal to your seme.
  9. It’s okay to be a damsel in distress once in a while- a lot of fujoshi dig that.
  10. You must not smoke- that’s a seme thing. Also, かわいくないだよ!Though it is permitted if you are seriously badass.
  11. Don’t worry if you’re older than your seme- the whole older uke younger seme thing is more common than you think… (*cough* *cough* Junjouromantickisaandyukinapair *cough* *cough*)
  12.  When dealing with a chibi seme, it’s okay to make the first move, but remember to leave the rest of it to the seme- he’ll know what to do. 😉
  13. Naked Aprons are powerful. Use them with caution.
  14. You body is the ultimate gift for your seme.
  15. And the most obvious one: you must be on the bottom- always…

~EpicCupcake signing out.