Windows Phoners

Okay, first? No free WordPress app for Windows Phones? Not fair. I like free apps that function properly. Actually it’s not just WordPress- it’s everything. For most app adverts I see the signs for android and apple or whatever and I notice Windows app store (or whatever it’s called) is always missing. Come on, developers! We Windows Phoners use apps too! Dont leave it to those fakers to con us into downloading pieces of excrement!

Ugh… You know what? My next phone’s gonna be a Samsung I can’t take this anymore. It’s taken me half an hour to write 13 sentences after continuously poking my phone to get it to write in the right place…

…I’ve had a lot of doughnuts…

EpicCipc…
EpocCu…
EpicCipcak-
AAAAAAARRGGGGH!
EpicCupcake signing out. (Nailed it 😉 )

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Happy Memory

Although it’s been a while since I thought about Grace, but recently I just remembered a nice memory.

It was sports day and as were watching the young athletes of our school beat the crap out of the not so athletic people in our school (like me) I decided to show her a story I was working on. She liked reading my stories so she agreed to it. So she read the first few paragraphs and then she stopped at some point and made this kind of face:

GYAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!

…It was my first slash (yaoi-boyxboy) short story series.

Teehee!

Teehee!

It was a good memory 😛

~EpicCupcake signing out.

Finally Giving In / The Dreaded E-word / Three Evil Exes

That’s it. I’ve had enough.

This is HALF TERM. Why am I spending it doing revision 24/7? It’s Saturday and in a few hours from now, I’m going to head down to my current volunteering placement thingy in Cancer Research UK. I was really nervous when I was heading over there, but the manager seemed (surprisingly) young and had this huge aura of niceness so I feel a little calmer now. I think I’m just gonna slack of this morning. Revision is seriously getting to me…

You know it’s really hard to balance your school work with all this extracurricular stuff, volunteering and placements. I went to the HealthCare club in my college where they had a talk about Personal Statements and more and now I’m just lost because one thing that kept coming up was ‘extracurricular activities’ and I was just thinking to myself:

‘I do… nothing…’

So now I’m sort of like freaking out and trying to look for stuff I can join and do and stuff, but it’s hard because I’m socially awkward. I know I’ve said over and over that it’s all about exposure to this kind of stuff but quite frankly the whole idea still scares me. And why wouldn’t it? Still I’m gonna try, I’m gonna scare myself into not being scared… if that makes sense.

I considered doing sports. Tori and I have been to the sports hall and played a bit of table tennis and badminton, but I’m not sure I want to do that. Just because I showed her my wrath in table tennis, she will never let that I lost to her in badminton go. I mean, when she talks about how hard maths is, she says:

‘I fail in maths like you fail in badminton.’ And then she laughs. Yes, thanks for that Tori. For highlighting my inability to play badminton. Actually, I think I’m quite good for someone who sucks at sport.

So sports is out of the question. (To be honest, it’s always been out of the question) but seriously, I don’t know what’s left. I used to play the piano, but stopped at grade 2 without doing the exam. I guess I could always say ‘I play the piano from time to time.’ but for some reason I can imagine them whipping out a piano from thin air and demanding me to play it.

But seriously, what else is there? I’m trying to join as many clubs as I can- like debate club for example. I know that sort of puts me in an awkward position- me standing up and screaming out my beliefs- but it seems kind fun and there are some occasions where my social anxiety fails to show up. Like when I did Annie back in primary school. I was Miss Hannigan and excuse my unmodest-ness  but I killed it. At that point I even considered acting as a career, as well as dancing, but I thought ‘no, I belong to science’.

I remember when I was righting the first draft of my CV and I was trying to think of what to write under hobbies. My real hobbies (other than blogging once a millennium) include reading manga and doujin, watching anime, j-dramas, k-dramas, t-dramas and countless E4 shows and there is absolutely no way I can write that without seeming like a TV addict and a Sofa Bear.

I saw this example CV they showed us in college and the person had written that they like the relax with a nice book and go on walks or something. Basic stuff like that. Not like ‘I’m an Olympic Archer and am part of a netball team, I help out in my local youth club and organise evens and perfect perfect perfect’.

I still have yet to touch my CV. I don’t really want to see it for a while…

But forget about all that jazz. Today I want to focus on how many different endings I can get on sim date games by Pacthesis. I think my favourite has to be this one– you should play it; it’s very goooood XD If case you don’t know, a sim date or dating sim is a game where you have to get you relationship points up with a guy (or a girl, depending) so until you reach dating status and to win you have to win someones heart and stuff. Some can be so long and it’s so rewarding when you win. I once played this one called pico sim date. IT WAS THE WORST. SERIOUSLY THERE IS NO WAY TO WIN. YOU CAN ONLY GO AFTER ONE GIRL (because the main character likes her) AND IF YOU TALK TO HER SOME EMO NINJAS COME AND ATTACK YOU AND IT DOESN’T MATTER HOW MANY TIMES YOU WORK OUT IN THE GYM, YOU CANT WIN. Moving on.

After hours of revision, I lost it one day I played the memory days sim date like a million times trying to get this ending and finally- I DID IT!

Three Evil Exes

To get this ending, you have to date all three boys and then break up with them, without becoming friends again and now that I think about it, I can’t believe how hard it was to get there. Once I was close but became friends withthe last guy after saying ‘I just want to be friends’. I thought that would make him hate me for sure, but we became friends… Then I got this ending:

The three evil exes ending was funny though. In the end, the whenever the girl gets another boyfriend, her three evil exes drive him away. Apparently, they still really like her. Even though she broke their hearts. Like, stamped on them. It took a lot of will power to get this ending…

That’s enough for this post, before I digress again.

Now if you’ll excuse me, I’ve got to do something extremely productive

Read book (yaoi)

sidebyside_11

Seme wa dare? And where are your spiky teeth, Rin? 😦

GYAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!

IT’S TOO BRIGHT!!! MABUSHIIIIIIIIIIII!!!

…What did I just see…?

Heehee 😀

~EpicCupcake signing out.

I Have a Thing For Curly Hair…

Cats are so frickin’ cute…

Imagine if for your whole life you thought you were a boy and then one day you found out that your parents were lying to you and that you are, indeed, a girl…

I don’t why I brought that up. That has nothing to do with today’s post but it just came into my head so I thought ‘What the heck, might as well…’

The topic isn’t something I normally talk about because it’s always been an awkward topic for me. Plus I don’t care that much about- talking about it, I mean. Today I’m going to be talking about hair love and relationships.

The reason I’m bringing up this topic now is because of a disagreement Tori and I have been having. There’s this guy that she likes and she thinks he’s super hot but I don’t see it. His eyes are really pretty, but that’s about it. To show her what true hotness looks like, I showed her this guy in my maths class who I sit behind and constantly stare at. I think he’s noticed me staring at him, because I always try to catch a glimpse of him face… He must think I’m a weirdo… But the first time I saw him, I was totally taken by him and I thanked the Lord that I dropped further maths and took mechanics (and bio). In my opinion, this guy looks like an angel. I cannot use mere words to describe him… and yet Tori goes ahead and uses the word ‘okay’. She says he’s ‘okay’. I tell her she needs to get her eyes checked causes he’s an 11, not a 5.I mean, he has GORGEOUS dark curly hair and a beautiful face and even the back of his head is cute. He’s got this cute voice and his laugh is really loud but for some reason I find that cute too.

He’s just awesome, okay? Awesome. Tori thought he was transgender cause he’s too feminine. I told her I was sure he didn’t have boobs or anything but I do have to admit, I suspect he’s gay.I feel silly thinking that just because his voice reminds me of every gay youtuber I know and because he looks effeminate. I don’t like to give into stereotypes mostly because I hate it when people turn assumptions into facts. I’m a scientist- I don’t work that way. But recently, I keep thinking that I have a really good gaydar because I swear, every guy I lust over turns out to be gay… I do kinda wish he were gay (he’d make the PERFECT uke) but also not because I’d never have a chance with him (#fujoshi_problems… why did I just hashtag…) At this rate I won’t ever get a boyfriend…

But back to my main point… relationships. I remember back in high school and even back in primary school how important relationships were. I remember talking about how far we had gotten with boys (In primary school too). Since all the other girls were interested in boys, it had become one of my life long goals to get a boyfriend. I know, how lame… But can you blame me when the word ‘boyfriend’ is all I’ve ever heard since I was a young girl.

When I finally realised that I didn’t really want a boyfriend, I thought I was asexual for 2 years. But then I realised that wasn’t it- I just didn’t want to get into a relationship because I hadn’t found someone I really liked. Now get ready for some sappy emotional stuff.

But then I did find someone I cared for a lot and I know this isn’t going to sound convincing after talking about how I’ve been lusting over the guy in my maths class. I met Phoenix. And ,yes, I had known her three years prior to that time but it was two year ago that I began to see the real her and I’m not going to spend the rest of this post talking about how awesome she is but I just have to say this.

I know this sounds absolutely stupid because I’m only 16, but I really do think that she is the one, that we are meant to be together and I can’t tell you why cause that complicated and confidential stuff and, not to mention, embarrassing. I just feel different towards her, like I’ve never  felt towards anyone else. It feels like she’s the most important person in my life, that she keeps me hanging in there and I always want to be by her side- to help her, to listen to her, to be there for her. Since I started liking her, I don’t care about being with anyone else. It’s like she’s the only one for me and everyone else (potential boy/girlfriends) is irrelevant.

I think I should stop there before this post gets weirder…

I’m not going to say whether this is love or not because I literally have zero experience in that field.

Plus I might explode with cringe overload if I do.

I just wanted to share my thoughts.

I apologise for the lack of posts lately. I have my mocks in 2 weeks so I’m like ‘REVISE REVISE REVISE!!!’ It’s a boring life…

I’ll be sure to post at some point between now and then. I may not have time though… If you’re into anime/manga, be sure to check out my other blog. My reviews are fairly short so they don’t take long to write so I might have time for those.

Be sure to check it out.

And don’t forget to… eat your veggies…

Yeah…

~EpicCupcake signing out.

The Other Side of Me

Who is this

I’ve been thinking about something lately, and it just popped into my head a few moments ago when I was sending a story off to Cinnamon (via email) for her to read (but mostly check). Back in primary school, expressing my emotions was never a problem for me. If you made me mad, you’d know it straight away. Back then, emails were pretty popular in my school and we’d spend ages online chatting to friends by email (who knows why we never used MSN or something. Thinking back, it kind of seems stupid…) Of course, now with BBM, What’s App etc. emails are almost a thing of the past. I’m pretty sure the people in my year only use their emails for facebook and sending files. If that’s not the case, well then… I guess it’s just me.

I’ve been writing since I was in primary school, but it only became serious when I started high school. I began to realise that I was able to express myself well in my writing, so I wrote a lot since I wasn’t able to express myself in school. Writing always reveals this other side of me. It reveals this girl who seems to have a lot to say. A girl who loves to amuse her readers by casually slipping puns her and there. A girl with a lot of ideas who radiates them confidently.

A girl who seems foreign to me.

I’m sure if I showed someone my writing, someone who doesn’t know me that well (that would be almost all most of the people in my year) they’d be pretty surprised with what they found. That’s why, when I was writing a quick message in that email, I wasn’t sure how to word it.

I quite private, you know. I try and show certain people certain personalities. Right now I’m showing you my ‘default’ personality. My ‘normal’ personality, if that makes sense. I’m being pretty open. But showing different personalities to different people, doesn’t it seem kind of fake? I’d love to have one personality that I’d be free to share with everybody, even if it made people hate me. I just want to be myself. But are those personalities me?

Let me run through some of my ‘alter egos’

First off, there’s default. Default is my most comfortable personality. I write using default so that’s probably why I don’t like other’s reading my work. Default isn’t very girly, she’s very analytical and loves jokes. She’s the personality I express on my blog. She likes to use big complex words to make her sound smart.

Then there’s ‘sarcastic’. She’s very sarcastic, a teeny bit sadistic and gets annoyed easily. I only seemed to show her around Grace when we were friends. I sometimes show her to other people like my sister and family friends that have annoyed me in the past… And a certain person who I will hopefully never mention here. (Don’t even ask because I won’t answer). She has a relatively low pitched voice. Her character makes me laugh.

Next it’s ‘hyper’. Hyper loves to annoy people, talk about anime etc and smile! She’s like Marmite- you either love her or hate her. Her voice has a higher pitch that default.

Then there’s ‘innocent’. She’s quiet and helpful and acts oblivious to some things. She’s shy and respectful and thinks she’s cute. And she tries to act cute… I don’t like her that much.

‘Normal’ is different to default. She’s what most people would expect in a normal human being. I won’t say much about her.

Finally there’s ‘aloof’. She prefers to stay silent and observes her surrounding. I like her because she seems kind of cool… in a way… She has a way of staring at a person so that her eyes penetrate deep into their soul, unlocking hidden secrets-!

Just being a little too poetic here!

I feel like I’ve revealed too much. Gosh, I feel kind of naked! But there it is. That’s how I feel. I used at least all of these personalities in school with the exception of default and now sarcastic. I’m not so close to Grace now so sarcastic doesn’t want to come out. Hahaha! I sound so weird! Why am I even typing ‘Hahaha!’ when I’m not even laughing?! I’m smiling now, but before I had a straight face.

Oh, gosh, I’m so messed up!

~EpicCupcake signingng

~EpicCuc

(Let’s try this again)

~EpicCupcake signing out.

Procrastination is my Middle Name

WHAT THE-!

No, it isn’t.

But I’ve been procrastinating a lot since Thursday and I haven’t been blogging since what feels like forever so I really wanted to make a post.

But the thing is, I haven’t really got anything in particular to talk about, so I’ll just talk about what’s been going on recently and what I’ve been thinking about and feeling and stuff. Try not to fall a sleep halfway through, okay?

This half term was supposed to be my revision week and although I didn’t take it seriously on Monday, on Tuesday and Wednesday I really did some hard-core revision. A good 7+ hours each day, but after Thursday, I kind of gave up. I even spent the whole of Friday reading manga… and the same goes for today.

In case you’re wondering, I went out this Thursday to London with my primary school buddies. If I have to name them on my blog them I guess I’ll call them Cloud and Tori which is actually fairly close to their real names (I’m not feeling very imaginative today). So we, the three amigos went skipping around Covent Garden etc. looking around, talking, eating… I even saw this show with this man wearing a kilt, balancing on a ladder and juggling knives. He even stripped a little (a little?) which I was a bit surprised to see. I don’t think other people were as excited as I was. *Blush* Just kidding! 🙂 I even got to touch the London Eye which I know isn’t a great feat but I’m kind of into touching famous landmarks now, like the Eiffel Tower for example. I don’t get it why when I told them I would love to touch Big Ben, my friends started laughing.

And they call me dirty-minded.

Well, overall it was a great day, apart from the part when Cloud wanted to go into Lush and I had to stop myself from choking on their toxic fumes. (I’m over exaggerating, needless to say. It’s not that bad)

Thursday also happened to be Halloween and I was a bit upset that I couldn’t celebrate it. I didn’t even get to carve a pumpkin or watch a scary movie! Last Halloween, I spent it with Cloud and, of course she still has to haunt my thoughts, Backstabber. It was a great Halloween, we stayed at my house, pigged out on junk food and sweets, carved two pumpkins with my sister and her friends, and watched a totally age-inappropriate scary movie. I didn’t do any of that stuff this year and I’m starting to wonder if I’m getting too old for Halloween. I stopped trick-or-treating when I started high school; I thought it was too embarrassing and that I was too old for it, but I’m not sure if that’s true or not. 11 years old doesn’t sound too mature (my apologies to all 11 year olds who strongly disagree) so that might not be the case. Still, I’m 15 which I know is young but…

Well I think Halloween’s for everyone, regardless of age! I hope that when I’m 50, I’ll carve a pumpkin and I’ll like it! (That sounded a bit weird, I’m way too hyper today…)

You know, speaking of Halloween and Backstabber, I went on Facebook to check out the pictures Cloud had uploaded and wondered how Backstabber spent her Halloween. It only made sense that she hung out with a bunch of people I don’t know wearing a witch costume and acting like they were her besties from life, from the pictures she uploaded. Well as long as she actually enjoying herself, good for her. It seems like the pain seems less now, because I haven’t seen her in a week.

Now let’s talk about yesterday…

Oh yesterday…

Remember that list of things I said I’ll never do again? I’m adding something extra:

Cooking Rice.

Yesterday I was soooooo hungry and it was just me, my sister and my brother at home. The fridge was empty apart from yogurt, juice and eggs and some sauce. I was tired of snacking and it didn’t look like my sister was going to make anything any time soon, so I decided to boil some rice to eat with the sauce in the fridge. So I put the water, waited for it to boil, added the rice. It seemed like it was going well… that is until I checked it some minutes later. The water was about to over flow and so was the rice. I told my sister and she told me that I’d put too much rice. She had to transfer it to another pot and by the time it was done, the rice filled one whole pot and a bit of another one and I thought:

‘Oh Lord help me, I’m so dead.’

I was so scared about what my parents would do, but in the end, when they came back, they just laughed at me to told me that I have to finish all the rice. That rice fills two plastic containers at the moment and this is after I’ve eaten three platefuls. Of course, they told me that I didn’t have to finish it, but I feel seriously guilty and so that’s all I’ve been eating for the past few days and I think it’s made my eczema worse, but the rice! THE RICE!!! I can’t rest until it’s all finished. So I’ll have to suck it up, take some antihistamines and eat that bloody rice. It doesn’t help that my sister is refusing to eat it. Oh well. We all make mistakes, eh?

Well, I’m off to go and eat some more rice (just kidding, I already had some which I was writing 😉 ) so I’ll finish here. I’ll hopefully be blogging more frequently when school starts again.

I’m sick of rice…

Happy November, by the way.

~EpicCupcake signing out.